Quotes 101 till 120 of 271.
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I tended to place my wife under a pedestal.
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I think being funny is not anyone's first choice.
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I think crime pays. The hours are good, you meet a lot of interesting people, you travel a lot.
Source: Take the Money and Run (1969) -
I think it was when I ran into Kerouac and Burroughs - when I was 17 - that I realized I was talking through an empty skull... I wasn't thinking my own thoughts or saying my own thoughts.
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I took a speed reading course and read 'War and Peace' in twenty minutes. It involves Russia.
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I took a speed-reading course and read War and Peace in twenty minutes. It involves Russia.
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I want people to bow as they see me and say he is gifted with poetry, he has seen the presence of the creator.
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I was involved in an extremely good example of oral contraception two weeks ago. I asked a girl to go to bed with me, she said "no."
Source: Standup Comic (1999) -
I was nauseous and tingly all over. I was either in love or I had smallpox.
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I was thrown out of college for cheating on the metaphysics exam; I looked into the soul of the boy sitting next to me.
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I was thrown out of N.Y.U. my freshman year for cheating on my metaphysics final. You know, I looked within the soul of the boy sitting next to me.
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I will not eat oysters. I want my food dead - not sick, not wounded - dead.
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I'd never join a club that would allow a person like me to become a member.
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I'm astounded by people who want to 'know' the universe when it's hard enough to find your way around Chinatown.
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I'm not afraid to die, I just don't want to be there when it happens.
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I'm such a good lover because I practice a lot on my own.
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I'm very proud of my gold pocket watch. My grandfather, on his deathbed, sold me this watch.
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I've never been an intellectual but I have this look.
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If it turns out that there is a God, I don't think that he's evil. But the worst that you can say about him is that basically he's an underachiever.
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If my films make one more person miserable, I'll feel I have done my job.
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