Quotes 21 till 34 of 34.
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My senior year of high school, I was voted 'Wittiest.' So, several years later, I decided to try my hand at writing humor to see if I could be witty enough to make some money.
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Next to being witty yourself, the best thing is being able to quote another's wit.
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No woman can be handsome by the force of features alone, any more that she can be witty by only the help of speech.
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Nowadays three witty turns of phrase and a lie make a writer.
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Observe it, the vulgar often laugh, but never smile, whereas well-bred people often smile, and seldom or never laugh. A witty thing never excited laughter, it pleases only the mind and never distorts the countenance.
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One cannot be always laughing at a man without now and then stumbling on something witty.
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People who can't be witty exert themselves to be devout and affectionate.
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Such is the nature of men, that howsoever they may acknowledge many others to be more witty, or more eloquent, or more learned; yet they will hardly believe there be many so wise as themselves.
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The present generation, wearied by its chimerical efforts, relapses into complete indolence. Its condition is that of a man who has only fallen asleep towards morning: first of all come great dreams, then a feeling of laziness, and finally a witty or clever excuse for remaining in bed.
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The witty woman is a tragic figure in American life. Wit destroys eroticism and eroticism destroys wit, so women must choose between taking lovers and taking no prisoners.
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There's no possibility of being witty without a little ill-nature - the malice of a good thing is the barb that makes it stick.
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To be witty is not enough. One must possess sufficient wit to avoid having too much of it.
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Well, well, perhaps I am a bit of a talker. A popular fellow such as I am - my friends get round me - we chaff, we sparkle, we tell witty stories - and somehow my tongue gets wagging. I have the gift of conversation. I've been told I ought to have a salon, whatever that may be.
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You can pretend to be serious; you can't pretend to be witty.
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